Missent

By A.R. Samson

THE FIRST inkling of an intimate relationship developing between text mates is the use of specific endearments in addressing each other. These are also accompanied by emoticons which visually communicate ecstasy, joy, and varying levels of happiness at sending or receiving messages. The speed of response also indicates reciprocal feelings. Delayed, or worse, absent replies portend a waning of emotions. This is hastily followed by the withdrawal of affection expressed without any endearments -- stop txtng, bf is hr.

The speed of mobile communication along with the flat rate of unlimited text messages and the hand phone penetration rate of 130% of the population, including babies, fetuses, and prisoners, have ushered in new social dangers, for which no etiquette has yet been devised. In the past age of printed wedding invitations, snail mail, and face-to-face meetings, social relationships take more time and effort to develop or destroy. Now the endearments are just cheap thrills.

(Caution: The following may contain phrases and innuendoes that may be offensive to the daily communicant.)

The "missent message" (MM) presents a deadly form of social damage. The most common type of MM can be a harmless statement meant for another individual -- the jackfruits from Davao are ready for pick-up in the usual place. Of course this particular note may really be about an edible produce to grace the dining table or it could be a coded message for something else. Still, the wrong recipient of this message (who did not order any jackfruit) may just dismiss it as a missent message. Still, she may text back with an ambiguous -- I look forward to enjoying the fruit in the usual manner. See you.

More perilous is a suggestive communication sent by mistake. It is hard to explain a message requesting particularly skimpy underwear (like dental floss) to be worn by the addressee when entering a specifically numbered room. This missive will be found merely entertaining if sent to an office colleague by mistake, unless this is an extremely young person, even if she happens to be a dentist.

The unattended cellphone can be beeping out a message (like a cow that has stepped on barbed wire) while one is in the showers. This situation can be a selling point for a new water-proof cellphone, delivered at the launch inside a fish bowl. Only the most upright husband with nothing to hide will ask his spouse to please check the message and communicate it to him. The wife relays the message: Jules says that your meeting is cancelled…. OH, Jules my drinking buddy from the office? Yes, your buddy says it’s his monthly curse and can’t bloody join you tonight.

The emotional outburst is another variant of the MM. While a letter (snail mail) can be snatched back from the mailing room in time, an e-mail or text can no longer be recalled once the "send" button is pressed -- "thanks for the memories, it was nice while it lasted." This message combined with the wrong addressee can be hazardous to your health.

Wars have started from intercepted messages, as in the case of the infamous Zimmerman telegram that snared America to join the allies in WW I. The telegram to the German ambassador in Washington from his foreign minister instructed the addressee to forge an alliance with Mexico against the United States should the latter join the war against Germany.

While paper trails can be burned to eliminate evidence of wrongdoing, seemingly untraceable electronic mails and text messages thought to have been deleted are now routinely resurrected from their electronic waste bins. The attempt to delete is one more proof that the message was meant to be hidden or retracted.

The impact of a missent message can be long-lasting. Saying that the message is not intended for the one who received it doesn’t help. The sentiments expressed might have been intended for another person who is the rightful recipient of the lustful intentions attached to them, but somebody else is affected by it. This is in the same category as overheard conversation-few hear nice things being said behind their backs.

If the lawyer’s admonition is followed to not put down anything incriminating in writing like orders for lockdowns, the modern equivalent is not to send a text message that can be missent or forwarded to an unintended recipient.

Endearing names are best expressed in person when these are also accompanied by even more endearing action. The text message is still helpful in providing the weather report of a relationship. Still, even typhoons have endearing names. In both cases, once the name is dropped, it only means the storm has passed… as has the relationship.